After months of ready… what the hell is inside Rowans cage?

It hasn’t even been 6 months since Erick Rowan was having fun with a implausible, if surprising, push which was arguably his finest 12 months as a WWE Celebrity. It was a bizarre one to say the least, as for a superb few months we watched Rowan fairly actually attempt to kill Roman Reigns. Probably the most weird half was Rowan pinning him clear alongside the best way, the rivalry ending, however with no clarification as to why he was abruptly so focused on first diploma murder..

Quick ahead to 2020. You’re in all probability pondering “Certainly Rowan is an enormous star now following a win over WWE’s poster boy?” Erm… not fairly. Rowan has spent the final variety of months, since that mega push, strolling round beating up native expertise and defending a cage that no-one can see within.

Can any person test on Vince please? Is he okay? May be time for his drugs…

We’ve not seen Rowan for a few weeks now, however because the thriller contents of the cage have just lately turn out to be a lot more sinister, this is pretty much as good a time as any to share what I might like to see in Rowans Thriller Field.

Mae Youngs Hand

Far and above my favorite potential resident of the cage. Mae Younger’s Hand was the head of Angle Period TV nonsense. It could make exactly zero sense in any respect, however neither does Erick Rowan strolling round with a pet service to be sincere. Rowan ought to declare to be the true father of the hand, which has clearly grown in spite of everything these years, and enter into an ill-advised rivalry with Mark Henry for custody of essentially the most unholy of creations.

Lil’ Jimmy

Rowan has taken Lil’ Jimmy hostage, main R Reality to chase the 24/7 title for six months desperately attempting to change his child. Lil’ Jimmy ought to escape the cage, making a determined plea for Reality to come and save him. Queue eight months of chasing, ambushes and native expertise squashes till Reality challenges Rowan to a ladder match for the custody of Lil’ Jimmy. WrestleMania 38 main event.

It is scary to me how a lot sense this makes and the way rattling entertaining it might be if booked by actually anyone however Vince McMahon.

Hornswoggle, Micro Cole, Jerry Smaller, El Torito and many others.

Okay, I’ll admit it. I really like midgets in wrestling. Virtually as a lot as Vince McMahon does, besides clearly nowhere close to as a lot as he does as a result of the loopy outdated man is OBSESSED with midgets. Wee-LC was correctly hilarious for anybody with any kind of humorousness. Have Swoggle come out of the cage to terrorise Rowans opponents from time to time, main to a distraction and a vicious Iron Claw for the win. Simple, clear, concise and clever reserving.

Shayna Baszler

Shayna is a licensed badass. She has dominated and reigned supreme over the NXT Women’s Division for a few years now and has been rumoured to make her main roster transfer for a short time now. So it makes good sense that this naked knuckle, tremendous robust, technically proficient, MMA badass killer ought to debut on RAW by biting a bit out of Becky Lynch’s neck after which disappearing. Good. I’m glad we’re all in settlement that “Shayna The Vampire” is the right approach to ebook her. It totally explains the biting, however I am undecided a pet service is the type of enclosure this cage fighter is used to…


Tajiri however with crimson mist as an alternative of inexperienced. Easy. Efficient. Explains the place he has been all these years. He was fairly quick as properly.

Aleister Black

I refuse to imagine that it was a mere coincidence to hear Black speaking about being caught within metaphorical cages this week on RAW. We’ve by no means seen Rowan and Black in the identical place on the identical time. Black within the cage confirmed.


I’ve been writing about this for thus lengthy that I’m beginning to query what life even is, so at this level Dean Ambrose’s potted plant Mitch makes as a lot sense as something. After being handled so badly by Chris Jericho, Mitch had nowhere to go. No profession. WWE docs wouldn’t clear him. He went throughout America to see the best specialists round. Mitch fought for his goals and his goals fought for him. He is again and this time… it’s private.

Al Snows ‘Head’

If this implies we get to see Al Snow again on TV I’m all for it. Hell, carry again the entire of the Job Squad. The one subject with that is that WWE have roughly 50 jobbers who might slot in there in the meanwhile… so not too dissimilar from the NWO’s hiring coverage. I’d be the first individual to imagine that Rowan has entered into an objectophilic (google it) relationship with a model head. Simply take a look at the man, if he wasn’t in WWE he’d be taking part in D&D in his mum’s basement.

Realistically It’s In all probability A Bearded Dragon

However the place is the enjoyable in that? What is the pay-off? “Oh it’s a bearded dragon… okay cool” is actually the one believable response to that. Absolutely anticipate this complete angle to boil down to one thing hideously boring after which disappear inside per week… simply like Rowan’s profession.

I can’t fairly imagine I’ve simply achieved an entire article on Erick Rowan’s “Littlest Petshop”. I feel I want to lie down…

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